How To Improve Your Conversation Skills

Don’t be afraid of being vulnerable, and sharing your feelings and emotions. This can sometimes be difficult, but it’s a good thing to get used to doing because then the other person will understand how you are feeling and why you might be acting a certain way. It allows you to be yourself rather than hiding your feelings and pretending everything is okay all the time.

This includes sharing if you are anxious. If you are open to doing that, you’re less likely to feel anxious at all because you don’t feel you have to hide it which can be anxiety-inducing in itself.

Another advantage of sharing your feelings and vulnerabilities with others is that they are more likely to feel comfortable opening up to you too. In this way, your friendship can deepen.

Ask the other person how they feel about something

Don’t be afraid to ask someone how they feel about something. Obviously, be sensitive, and don’t ask them about very personal or difficult topics that they probably wouldn’t want to talk about. But in general, it’s okay to ask people about their feelings. For example, if they are starting a new job soon, ask how they feel about leaving their old colleagues, or whether they are nervous about starting the new job. This opens a new and more personal dimension to the conversation rather than just talking about straight facts and events.

Do an activity

It’s a good idea to plan an activity to do with your friend, in addition to talking. This could be going to the shops, the cinema or getting some food or drinks together. In a video call, you could play a game or do a quiz together, or have a drink and snack while you are talking. This gives you a break from talking, gives you something else to talk about afterwards and makes the interaction feel more natural.

Try to remember the things they tell you

It’s a good idea to try to remember as many things as possible that your friend tells you, so you can ask them about those things next time. Remembering what they told you will help to strengthen the friendship and will provide continuity between your meet-ups. You can ask them specific questions about how certain situations are going in their lives, rather than starting fresh with small talk such as ‘what have you been up to?’ each time you meet up.

After you have said your goodbyes and parted ways, it’s a good idea to run your conversations through your head so you are more likely to remember what you talked about. You can even write down some notes if you like, and these can help you write your ‘conversation topic ideas’ for the next time you meet up.

I recently read a great book called Unlimited Memory which includes many techniques for strengthening your memory and remembering things that you are told. I’d recommend checking this book out, especially if you tend to easily forget what is going on in your friends’ lives.

Be yourself and be human

We all have human needs. If you need a drink, say so and get one. If you need the loo, go. If you need to cough or blow your nose, do so. You don’t have to stifle your humanity and needs for the sake of a ‘perfect’ interaction. You’ll make the other person feel more at ease too if you do normal human things like that.

I hope you have found these tips helpful for improving your conversation skills!

Would you consider yourself to be a good conversationalist? Did you learn anything new in this post? Do you have any other tips for improving your conversation skills? Let me know in the comments below!